Happiness has to be one of those desires right up there with winning the lottery, and world peace! I mean who doesn't want to be happy? That is if you aren't afraid of all those 'happy haters' out there. (you know who you are)
It's way easier to be cynical, pissed off, frustrated, and depressed than it is to be happy. Not that it feels good to live in any of those states of being… but it doesn't require much work to get there or stay there.
Happiness on the other hand is much more elusive than those other emotions. Why is it so much harder to be happy? Does happiness stay locked away somewhere until something comes along and sets it free?
Who, or what is holding your happiness hostage?
It can help to understand what inspires happiness... You could think of peace, and contentment, as states of being we enter when all of our needs our met and we don't feel threatened or fearful.
Happiness is a step above that. It's what happens when we have more than enough… time, space, money, love, you name it. When we receive input that sends our well-being and connection meters above average, happiness follows.
That feeling of abundance, flips the happiness switch in our bodies. Some would say this is our natural state, that we are all born abundant. But if abundance is our natural state, shouldn't we all be walking around happy? The thing is most of us are not living in our natural state. We are living in rhythms and routines created by the mind of man, not nature. So most of us are running on 'E'mpty… in a state of chronic depletion. Where there never seems to be enough time, money, love, rest, etc...
Instead of abundance, more often we experience not having enough. We are just trying to get through the day and meet all that is being demanded of us with whatever we have in us. From this empty place, we have very little left to give to ourselves, or the people we love.
We will even look to people, and other things outside of ourselves to bring happiness into our lives. It's a natural reflex that can make us dependent on our relationships, or external fixes for our well-being. Which can inevitably lead to more unhappiness! So how do we deal with depletion and return to a natural state that will set our happiness free?
You go within.
Inside each of us is a well of yummy, ecstatic, orgasmic, life force energy. And the more we learn how to cultivate and circulate this energy in our bodies... the more we are empowered to leave the insanity of our minds behind. And experience having enough, and being enough.
When we can have a direct experience of abundance in this way, inside our own bodies, happiness is a common side effect :) No one's holding your happiness hostage but you, and with the right guidance you can become masterful at setting it free.
A great first step is coming the weekend immersion I teach for Embody Tantra. The Awaken Weekend will give you tools and skills that can lead to happiness for a lifetime.
Or for women, my monthly women's circle is happening this Thurs. night. 10/23 in Culver City. You'll be able to explore how your sexual energy can re-vitalize your life in a safe and intimate environment.